Wednesday, December 15
i am the Fool, again
Read the quote above. i wonder could it be true? i am a liar. i lied for the man i love and i have lied to the man i love. i have told so many lies in my 20-something years of living and i have been lied to so many times, also by this same man i love, still love. i lied to my family and friends, i chose him over everyone else because i believed in the "the story of us". now, i can't trust him. agghh... to hell with it all! anyhow, here's something i picked up from the net: How to know when someone is lying 1. Look for body language that might indicate someone is lying, such as not looking you in the eye when speaking to you, being fidgety, or acting nervous or uncomfortable. -- honestly, i didn't fidget when i told my lie, i am a good one. nor did my sweetheart when i caught him red-handed lying to me, on my face. we could both be a criminals, be caught and deny all accusations til death. 2. Listen for inconsistencies in what the person tells you, such as different stories on different days, different time frames, mistakes in remembering details or mixing up details. -- oh, this one never would never work because i am always accused by my sweetheart of having poor memory in remember things. hell, i KNOW when i hear an inconsistency! 3. Notice if the person steadfastly resists answering any questions. Extreme defensiveness could mean that he or she is trying to hide something. -- again, this wont work in my case. what's defensiveness anyhow? when i start an argument or rather asking questions, i get brushed off right away. reason: "he doesn't want any argument. i'm getting jealous for no reason and all i am saying is nonsense" 4. Notice if the person accuses you of lying or being deceitful when you really haven't been. This could reflect the other person's own underlying behavior, which he or she is projecting onto you rather than owning up to it. -- Oh LOL! he uses that on me everytime! hahahhaha 5. Listen to your gut and intuition. You may just know someone is lying. If you are not sure, don't jump to conclusions. Try to get some evidence to back up your hunch. -- my intuition never failed me. but problem is i can only get a real proof of his affairs in like 1 out of 10 of his total lies. 6. Consider asking directly if the person has lied to you. Many people feel bad getting caught up in lies, and find it a relief to finally be honest. -- i asked him. already did. he lied to my face and even when i said, "with God as our witness? i prayed hard that God must take me from you if ever he deceit me." he looked straight in my eyes and told me, "you are my one and only behbeh (baby)" 7. Try to be understanding and listen to the person's reasons for lying. Was he trying not to hurt you? Was he afraid you would be angry, upset or disappointed? -- lol, he was havign an affair. naturally, he'd hurt me. should i excuse that? 8. Look at your possible role in having someone lie to you. Are you someone who gets so upset hearing the truth that others feel they can't be honest with you? -- if you are my boyfriend and you lie to me about having an affair, should i smile and thank you for telling me?
craving chocolate @ 9:56 PM
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